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Post by gialloblu on Feb 14, 2006 22:24:01 GMT 10
Q. You're out driving and see a kid in a scum jersey riding a bike. Do you swerve to hit him? Why/why not?
A. No. Its probably your bike.
New teacher's first day teaching at a Newcastle school. Teacher tries to break the ice with the kids by asking "Who here's a Jets fan?"
All the kids raise their hands except one. The teacher asks this kid "Timmy, aren't you a Jets fan?"
Timmy: "No, I'm a Mariner"
Teacher's starting to lose her cool and asks "Why are you Mariner?"
Timmy: "Well, my mum's a Mariner, and my Dad's a Mariner, so I'm a Mariner"
Teacher's really losing it now and shoots back "Well, if your mum was a prostitute and your dad was in jail, what would you be?"
Timmy: "A Jets fan"
Anybody else got any jokes (even if they're, like mine, they're copied from overseas clubs)?
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Post by greenpoleffc on Feb 14, 2006 22:32:54 GMT 10
Bloke pulls up at a servo and it is mayhem..........ambulances,police,fire engines, lots of smoke and people runnig everywhere.
"WTF has happened here"
"Jets supporter came in and was so depressed about sh*t team no fans, he poured petrol all over himself and set himself on fire"
"Thats terrible" says I "what did you do?"
"Had a quick whip round for the rest of the family" he replied
"Thats kind of you, what did you get?"
"About 20 litres"
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Post by gialloblu on Feb 14, 2006 22:34:22 GMT 10
;D ;D ;D
nice one
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Post by greenpoleffc on Feb 14, 2006 22:49:59 GMT 10
But wait theres more.................
Q: What do you call a Jets fan in a 2 storey house?
A: A burglar
Q: What do you say to a Jets fan with a job?
A: Can I have a Big Mac please!
Richard Money(shot) was wheeling his shopping trolley across the supermarket car park when he noticed an old lady struggling with her shopping.
He stopped and asked, "Can you manage dear?" to which the old lady replied, "no way you got yourself into this mess, don't ask me to sort it out!"
Q: What do you call a jets fan in a suit?
A: The accused.
Money(shot) walks into a sperm donor bank,
"I'd like to donate some sperm" he says to the receptionist.
"Certainly Sir" replies the receptionist, "have you donated before?".
"Yes" replies money "you should have my details on your computer".
"Oh yes, I've found your details" says the receptionist "but I see you're going to need help. Shall I call an assistant for you?"
"Why do I need help?" asks Money. The receptionist replies
"Well , it says on your record that you're a useless wanker...."
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Post by Bearinator on Feb 14, 2006 22:54:55 GMT 10
Q. What do u do if a jets fan is running at u with half a head???
A. Stop laughing and reload.
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Post by Grunta on Feb 15, 2006 11:30:14 GMT 10
How do you stop a Jets fan from drowning?
Take your foot off his head
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Post by blackadder on Feb 15, 2006 11:45:02 GMT 10
What do you call a Jets fan with a shopping trolley?
A home owner
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Post by forzamariners on Feb 15, 2006 13:09:33 GMT 10
Insert any scouse joke here -->__<--
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Post by Nah. on Feb 15, 2006 14:41:54 GMT 10
hmmmm...
Q. what do you call a jf in a red ferrari?
A. a thief
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Post by Sam on Feb 15, 2006 15:37:38 GMT 10
I got a joke about newcastle......the jets
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wok
State League player
Posts: 255
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Post by wok on Feb 15, 2006 15:56:39 GMT 10
Q: What do you call 5 jets fans in a car going over a cliff?
A: Waste of space, you can fit another 3 in the boot.
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Post by Nah. on Feb 15, 2006 16:45:23 GMT 10
ha ha ha i remember in an issue of mad there was a thing about hillbilly weddigns or something, there were jokes and crap, as you would expect in Mad, i will have to go through my pile and find it.
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